Train Of Thought

Each and every day Marianne chooses which train of thought to board. Today is like every day before for her as she chooses the train of negativity.
It all began when she hit the snooze button once too often leading her to panic and rush so that she could leave her overpriced yet magnificent city apartment at exactly the right time so that she can catch the last train to her dream fashion magazine job.
'Oh come on, come on' she hollers at the elevator as it seems to take ages for it to open. Finally it does and waits impatiently in the lift quickly checking her phone. She is receiving strange glances from the two other inhabitants of the lift so she decides to check herself in her compact mirror.
'Oh crap' she declares as she realises that her hair is a complete mess and her quickly applied lipstick is not fully in position. 'Bugger it I will do it on the train' she says to herself. The lift seems to stop at almost every floor and when it reaches ground level it is pretty full. Marianne rushes out, pushing past the others without even apologising. Many of who comment disapprovingly about her actions.
She rushes through the streets, almost getting knocked over by a bus on her way to the underground. She rushes through the turnstile and slips through the train doors just as they close. When inside there is no room to sit so she juggles trying to stand still with fixing her hair and make-up.
Finally she arrives at her place of work. It has taken her 15 mins to get there. She again battles with the elevator challenges as her office is on the 3rd floor of this large gothic style building.
'Marianne can I see you in my office please' calls the editor and chief of the magazine Zoe.
'Yes of course' she replies.
Glances from others in the office indicate that Zoe is on the warpath as they keep heads down.
On her way to the office her best friend Bethany whispers 'Good luck Mari.' Marianne winks at her in gratitude.
'Close the door please and take a seat' Zoe says in a strong tone.
Marianne does as she is told and doesn't say a word.
'Marianne is everything alright for you?'
'Mmm yes Zoe' she responds shocked at Zoe's concern.
'You see the reason why I ask this is because you are rushing in here just in time every day, which ordinarily would not be a huge problem but Marianne I have to be brutally honest but you are our fashion blogger and you look a mess.'
'Oh' the realisation hits Marianne like a steam train.
You see Marianne loves everything about fashion and until she won the fashion blogger award last year she was living day to day with very little money but a big vision about how fashion can assist in helping a person transform themselves instantly. She has realised that she has lost her purpose, her mojo.
'I do not want to say this Marianne but I am going to have to let you go, this has gone on too long and in this business we cannot afford to let things linger on'
'No please Zoe, just give me a chance. I promise that I will get my act together. Just give me until the end of the week and you will see a huge difference'
'Oh I don't know Marianne, when I make a decision I stick to it.' she pauses for a moment in contemplation and Marianne pierces her green puppy dog eyes her way. 'Oh ok I do like you and I believe in your ability'
'Oh thank you thank you, you won't regret it I promise.'
'I certainly hope not Marianne, I have a reputation to uphold here in this office and with the production of the magazine. Now go and I will see you back in this office on Friday morning.'
She leaves the office and Bethany follows.
'What happened?'
'I nearly got sacked Beth, I have to get my act together or everything I have worked so hard to achieve will disappear'
'You have been overdoing it a bit though haven't you?'
'Yeah I know, it's going to have to change'
'So an early night tonight then' Bethany suggests.
'Yes that sounds like a good start'
Her day went in quickly but she was somewhat distracted by the morning's realisation which really didn't help to make a good impression on Zoe.
That night she went to bed earlier but could not sleep, her mind was too busy thinking about the horrors that will follow if she loses her job. 'What will everyone think?' she thins to herself. Her job is her life.
The next morning is much the same as the one before and she knows that she is in trouble.
On her way home from work that day she is drawn to a small intimate cafe. It is very quiet and the only customer is a little old lady.
She orders a coffee and takes a seat by the window. she automatically takes out her phone and begins to sort through emails and social media. She is off on a tangent again without even realising.
'Young lady' the old woman says trying to get her attention. She doesnt hear her.
The old lady doesnt give up and even though her mobility isn't great she makes her way over to Marianne.
'Hello dear' she says touching Marianne on the shoulder. Marianne sits upright as if she has just been given a physical shock of some sort. It sends a shiver through her and she jumps slightly.
' Sorry dear I didnt mean to make you jump' she aplogises