Truth Or Dare

Entry by: Mac

20th January 2017

(An aboriginal legend is that rivers dream and the dreams become spirit and spirit becomes a life … and that life becomes you.)

The river is dreaming … ripples create lives that emerge to become the realm of those who walk upright … for a second or for decades, each in its own way a lifetime … and I emerged into mine almost eighty years ago.

The river is dreaming and I walk … forward and sideways into life … never backwards … I can’t return … I can’t rewrite the dream … I can only take it and live it and make of it what I will … and my will – and chance – give the dream direction … and give thanks to the river.

I meet others and feel desire … the dream of one and then another becomes a surge of ripples, a torrent … desires mingle, meld … two streams become one … the river dreams all and each makes choices … or chance diverts the flow … and the illusion of two-in-one lasts for as long as it will …

All along ago, a river night time dreaming … dreaming me into existence … and I float away alone, uncertain of every second … until I meet another … and hope for two in one … and two-in-one together making certainty … such a daring moment, a daring choice - daring inevitability, I thought at the time, knowing from the first moment it could kill me.

I met many others … some friends, some passing by, some indifferent to me … some lovers … there was only one you … that one rippling reflection of me – and I despaired at what I saw … but still I wanted … wanted you … and dared … believing in kill or cure – you did neither … but what ungodly river dreamt you? … there is only one river and it dreamt both of us … and I saw my reflection in you … agony beyond words in that realisation … it’s a truth I don’t want … we are shadows of each other. Terrible shadows.

You were a furtive pirate of the night, plundering hopes for your delight … then stealing more of my soul to prove that you could, to gain reassurance of your idea of love … you dared and, in a rare moment of truth, I gave in …

I approach the end now … the river dream that was mine is tired, waiting for death … in all that time so many truths but only one that I dared to open up to … only one moment when I thought the dreaming would create some life-defying reality … eternity with you, two become one … the moment of truth is a lie … the river is dreaming …