A Letter To...
Entry by: DeLaWonk
30th April 2015
Dear Anthony Coburn,
I hope you don't mind that I've written to you, like this. I just couldn't think of any other way to write to you and this seemed to fit. I remember you.
When you appeared, in my form, in that first year of high school and you were exotic. You were exotic to us because you had a Manchester accent, and hadn't come from any of the schools like everybody else. You were completely new. I remember your ginger hair, freckles, small frame and tiny teeth that twisted a bit. You were funny and we became friends. Straight away. I don't even remember what it was we used to laugh about but I remember loving being around you because you made me laugh so hard. A talent, to have me laugh like that.
I remember when you told me about your baby brother, he had been born without the roof of his mouth and had to stay in hospital. This puzzled me. I couldn't work it out. How could you be born without the roof of your mouth? Wouldn't all the other stuff that sits above it fall out? I'd run my tongue over and over the roof of my own mouth trying to work out how that could be. I have so many little memories that like your teeth, you twist into.
Like when I fell out with my best friend Stacy. You knew all about it, how she was being stolen from me by Steph. You egged me on to do something about it. Breaking the plastic painted silver 'best friends forever' necklace over hot tears was the something I did. You relished in showing the broken pieces to Stacy. Stacey and I managed to fix the friendship, just without the best bit. That got swept up in the halls.
We walked the same way to the bus from school. Always together. The back way, past that poor house with the blue door that was the object of every fist that past to play knock and run upon it. Do you remember that? I secretly felt bad for whoever lived in that house. They probably hadn't answered their own front door in years. It was the last house before the steps would take us down to cut across the horsey field. Popping back out again by the river. I remember the time when we all went that way, with Scott and Gemma and Darren. Scott did the customary knock and run and left a slate he had found on top of a stone. So the person who never answered their own front door might slip on it. I wanted to move it. But I didn't. They would see it anyway, as they looked out of their window, instead of answering the door.
We charged down the steps, tried to entice the ponies with grass to come to us. The horsey field. What more perfect name to be given by a whole school. I wonder if they still call it the horsey field? If the kids cut across that way still. If that door is still blue. If small fists still terrorise it. Maybe one day I'll go and look. I won't knock though.
That time, we all decided to 'snog' each other. I got paired up with Darren. I would've preferred Scott but that's how the game goes. He didn't use tongues and it was weird. Us both gasping for air like fish out of water. Hardly a snog really. It just happened to be that our lips and teeth were gnashing against one another at the same time. When we got to the bottom, and the rest went running off you asked me if we could snog. I wasn't sure. It seemed weird but you talked me round. We did. You used your tongue. With your small mouth and me, a marshmallow in a coat I had been promised I would grow into.
One day, you just weren't in school. And we all asked where you were. We were told nothing, that you would be back. Eventually everyone stopped asking, stopped wondering, and your name was no longer called out on the register. I didn't stop wondering though. I missed you. I still think about you every once in a while. Even though that was over 15 years ago. Time has lead me to question where you came from, why you went. How did you wind up with us in the first place? My mind skips over all kinds of assumptions, witness protection is one I come to a lot. I wonder if your baby brother ever managed to grow the roof of his mouth. I once searched for you on google, and facebook. You are not there. I don't even know if I'm spelling your name right. Or if it's even ok to write about you. I guess my curious part wonders if you'll somehow see this and go 'It's me! I remember you too' and you'll tell me all about it. If there is even anything to tell. Or maybe after all this time it would just seem weird. I don't think about you constantly, or have a heart around your face on the school photo or anything like that. You just, have this habit of popping up in my mind every few years and you did again, when I saw the title for this piece. All I know is that you made me laugh, that we were friends, even if it was only for a short while, and now there is only speculation on where you once were.
I hope you don't mind that I've written to you, like this. I just couldn't think of any other way to write to you and this seemed to fit. I remember you.
When you appeared, in my form, in that first year of high school and you were exotic. You were exotic to us because you had a Manchester accent, and hadn't come from any of the schools like everybody else. You were completely new. I remember your ginger hair, freckles, small frame and tiny teeth that twisted a bit. You were funny and we became friends. Straight away. I don't even remember what it was we used to laugh about but I remember loving being around you because you made me laugh so hard. A talent, to have me laugh like that.
I remember when you told me about your baby brother, he had been born without the roof of his mouth and had to stay in hospital. This puzzled me. I couldn't work it out. How could you be born without the roof of your mouth? Wouldn't all the other stuff that sits above it fall out? I'd run my tongue over and over the roof of my own mouth trying to work out how that could be. I have so many little memories that like your teeth, you twist into.
Like when I fell out with my best friend Stacy. You knew all about it, how she was being stolen from me by Steph. You egged me on to do something about it. Breaking the plastic painted silver 'best friends forever' necklace over hot tears was the something I did. You relished in showing the broken pieces to Stacy. Stacey and I managed to fix the friendship, just without the best bit. That got swept up in the halls.
We walked the same way to the bus from school. Always together. The back way, past that poor house with the blue door that was the object of every fist that past to play knock and run upon it. Do you remember that? I secretly felt bad for whoever lived in that house. They probably hadn't answered their own front door in years. It was the last house before the steps would take us down to cut across the horsey field. Popping back out again by the river. I remember the time when we all went that way, with Scott and Gemma and Darren. Scott did the customary knock and run and left a slate he had found on top of a stone. So the person who never answered their own front door might slip on it. I wanted to move it. But I didn't. They would see it anyway, as they looked out of their window, instead of answering the door.
We charged down the steps, tried to entice the ponies with grass to come to us. The horsey field. What more perfect name to be given by a whole school. I wonder if they still call it the horsey field? If the kids cut across that way still. If that door is still blue. If small fists still terrorise it. Maybe one day I'll go and look. I won't knock though.
That time, we all decided to 'snog' each other. I got paired up with Darren. I would've preferred Scott but that's how the game goes. He didn't use tongues and it was weird. Us both gasping for air like fish out of water. Hardly a snog really. It just happened to be that our lips and teeth were gnashing against one another at the same time. When we got to the bottom, and the rest went running off you asked me if we could snog. I wasn't sure. It seemed weird but you talked me round. We did. You used your tongue. With your small mouth and me, a marshmallow in a coat I had been promised I would grow into.
One day, you just weren't in school. And we all asked where you were. We were told nothing, that you would be back. Eventually everyone stopped asking, stopped wondering, and your name was no longer called out on the register. I didn't stop wondering though. I missed you. I still think about you every once in a while. Even though that was over 15 years ago. Time has lead me to question where you came from, why you went. How did you wind up with us in the first place? My mind skips over all kinds of assumptions, witness protection is one I come to a lot. I wonder if your baby brother ever managed to grow the roof of his mouth. I once searched for you on google, and facebook. You are not there. I don't even know if I'm spelling your name right. Or if it's even ok to write about you. I guess my curious part wonders if you'll somehow see this and go 'It's me! I remember you too' and you'll tell me all about it. If there is even anything to tell. Or maybe after all this time it would just seem weird. I don't think about you constantly, or have a heart around your face on the school photo or anything like that. You just, have this habit of popping up in my mind every few years and you did again, when I saw the title for this piece. All I know is that you made me laugh, that we were friends, even if it was only for a short while, and now there is only speculation on where you once were.
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